Same sex couple issues, need Advice

2021.12.03 05:02 losloppie Same sex couple issues, need Advice

Hello
I am really struggling with life right now, more from the lack of friends or family to guide me through this and give me advice. So I come to you for help. The internet always wins and I love hearing everyone's opinions, for better or for worse.
I am 28, was married at 23 to my Husband. We had our ups and downs throughout the beginning of our relationship. When we first started dating, I found out he had been snapping other men about 6 months in, including his ex. It almost caused us to break up but we worked through it, got engaged.
College friends found him on Grindr 2-3 months after engaged, I'm not sure why but I gave him another chance at this point and a few months later we got married. Life ( from what I know) had been uneventful for the last 5 years, I have been happy as anything and we both have very successful jobs, bought a house etc.
This year we have been married for 5 years. 5 years of my life I have given to this man. 2 months ago we had some friends over at our house from out of town that were a couple. My husband at the time told me how cute he thought the one boys was. Sure I agreed he was cute, but I guess he wanted to take it to the next level.
So in the following two weeks , unbeknownst to me my husband and this boy had been talking over Instagram telling each other god knows what. My husband and me , both travel extensively for work. So luckily for my Husband, he got to go spend a night in a town near this "friend". While this was occurring I was at home preparing, our home which we had recently built, for his family reunion he was hosting when he got home from work.
( To put into a short phrase what was happening, while I was at home , buying groceries for his family to eat, cleaning the beds they would sleep in, he was in a hotel room 234 miles way from me sucking on this kids Dick, and getting sucked off at the same time).
This was all discovered the night his family arrived at our house. I guess what had occurred is that the other "friend" who was dating this boy had gone through this guys phone and found all the information and made him spill the beans. My husband pulled me into the garage around Midnight to tell me what had happened.
2-3 months now and I am still with him. Yes I gave him another chance. Why I am still questioning . I sit at home everyday and have severe hatred towards him for what he did, but why do I still love him? I am hurting deep inside I cannot bring myself to leave this man because I still love him. But deep down inside I cant see myself having a child with this man, he lied to me and betrayed me on the highest level.
I have no one to talk to , my parents still think he is gods gift to our family, I am too embarrassed to tell them what happened. My friends, some of them say give him another chance, some of them say leave him. But how many chances must I give. I am so scared to leave because what if I regret this? Who the hell is going to want to date a divorced 28/29 year old lol? I'm scared to be alone and don't know how to love myself.
Therapy online is not helping, and most places in my town have a 4-5 month waitlist. I guess I'm not the only one in this situation.
If anyone is out there who has gone through something similar or if you have advice for me, please let me know. I am really struggling these days.
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2021.12.03 05:02 furysammy Hold on!!

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Here is my list with ideas that I had (keep in mind that I don't want all those changes implemented at once, only 1 of them):

  1. Reduce gold cost - boring solution, probably unit will still be useless (but worked for Zhuge Nu).
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  5. Defensive/Offensive Stances - ability to switch between defensive (shield + sword)/offensive (two hander with splash) modes - as I understand, it goes against AoE4 design philosophy where most units don't have extra abilities.
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They are just kids and they don't really have problems. We, in our 30s and above should be the ones posting in relationshipadvice etc because we're grownups, we're going through real life.
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I believe they just pull something out of their asses so the playerbase can feel like Sora Ltd actually cares about balance.
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